It's a Wonderful Duel
by Drake Clawfang
Summary: Like I need to say what this story parodies? Durng the journey to Kaiba Corp Isle at Battle City, Yugi wonders what would have happened if he had never solved the Millennium Puzzle.


**Drake's Challenge: Identify the quotes at the end of the story! Who said each of them???**

It's a Wonderful Duel

Yugi lay awake in bed, looking up at the ceiling. Kaiba Craft III continued to Kaiba Corp Isle, and for all Yugi knew Yami Marik could burst into his room at any moment.

"This is so stupid." Yugi groaned. He sat up and glared at the Millennium Puzzle. "Ever since I solved you you've caused nothing but trouble!" He threw the Item across the room angrily and lay back in bed. "I wish I had never solved that stupid Puzzle." He grumbled.

"Oh what a drama queen." Yugi sat up in bed and stared at the boy in his doorway. The boy had spiked black hair and a black trenchcoat over black jeans and a shirt.

"Who are you?" Yugi asked. The boy shrugged.

"I'm Drake. In this reality you have no clue who I am, but in another time and place, it's a different story. I was sent here to show you what would have happened if you had never completed the Millennium Puzzle."

"Thanks…Drake, but I think Yami Bakura is due to show up in a few days, so I'm too busy." Yugi replied.

"Actually he won't be around for another couple seasons, but I've frozen time, so don't worry." Drake assured him. "Let's go." Yugi got out of bed and sighed.

"I guess I have no choice." He said, opening the bedroom door. "After you." Drake walked through, and Yugi slammed the door shut, spinning around to scream at the sight of Drake reclining on his bed.

"If I had a nickel for every time someone tried that." Drake mused. He stood up and lifted a hand, the bedroom door opening to a bright light. "Your time is frozen but mine still ticks, so let's haul ass Muto." Drake grabbed Yugi's hand and pulled him through the door.

- - - - - - - - - -

"Our first stop." Drake said, walking out of the door to the high school and bringing Yugi with him. "Look familiar?" Yugi looked on at the bully beating up Joey and Tristan.

"Yeah, Joey and Tristan got hassled by this guy for beating me up." Yugi said. "And then I came by and…" He trailed off as a slightly younger Yugi walked around the corner and stopped at the sight. "Yeah, I come to their defense." Yugi said. The younger Yugi gulped and ran away. "Hey…"

"Someone is amnesiac." Drake sighed. "Joey tossed the Puzzle piece in the river, and he only got it back for you when you came to his defense. Ergo, you don't come to his defense, and he doesn't get you the piece, the Puzzle is never solved."

"That's…great." Yugi groaned. "Can I go back to bed now?" Drake burst out laughing.

"It's not that easy Yugi. I've got all kinds of neat things to show you. C'mon." Drake pulled open the school door. "Shall we?"

"You're enjoying this, aren't you?" Yugi grumbled.

"Oh yeah." Drake grinned, pushing him inside.

- - - - - - - - - -

"Welcome to Domino High Cafeteria." Drake said, spreading his arms. Yugi looked around the room, before settling his gaze on the Alternate Yugi eating a sandwich at a table. "It's been about a week since you solved…excuse me, _didn't_ solve the Puzzle. Let's watch." Yugi gave Drake an odd look and turned back as Téa sat down opposite Yugi.

"Yugi, heads up, Joey's looking for you." She hissed. Yugi gulped.

"Ah no, not again." He groaned, ducking under the table. "Hide me." Téa reached over and grabbed the back of his collar, pulling him back up.

"Yugi, sheesh, grow a back bone. You have to stand up for yourself more." Téa scolded.

"You don't get it Téa, I told the principal Joey and Martin got in a fight last week. Joey's gonna kill me."

"You'll be fine." Téa rolled her eyes. "Just don't back down and…" Téa trailed off as a brunette teen walked across the cafeteria. "Hello tall, dark and delicious…" Téa whispered. "Be right back." Téa got up and followed the boy down the hall.

"This is stupid." Yugi scoffed. "The Téa I know hates Kaiba."

"But the Téa he knows doesn't." Drake said. "Téa only hated Kaiba because she never took the opportunity to like him. See when you solved the Puzzle, Téa got a crush on Yami, and as you became independent, on you too. But, no Puzzle, no spirit, you're still a wuss, and Téa, well…with no one else around, she went for Kaiba." Drake shrugged innocently. The cafeteria doors banged open, and Joey marched up to Yugi's table angrily.

"Tanks a lot ya little runt!" He snapped. "Tanks to you I got expelled for fighting!"

"I didn't mean to Joey, really! He just asked if I saw the fight and I said yes! Yugi whimpered.

"Shut it Muto! Ya little runt." Joey growled and stomped away angrily.

"So let's have a mental checklist here. You're a wimp, Téa's drooling over Kaiba, and Joey got expelled." Drake said. "You done yet?"

"This isn't that bad." Yugi shrugged. "I could live like this." Drake snorted.

"Oh really?" He replied. "Well then someone hasn't learned yet. C'mon." Drake opened the door again. "Let's move on."

- - - - - - - - - -

"Okay, we're here at the Game Shop." Drake said, waving his hand at Alternate Yugi, who was manning the cash register. "It's been a month now, and your Grandpa is at Duelist Kingdom, leaving you to man the store."

"Duelist Kingdom?" Yugi asked.

"Yeah, since you never made friends with Joey and Tristan, Kaiba never found out about Grandpa's Blue-Eyes until after Grandpa had become skilled enough that Kaiba couldn't beat him and take it. He's a top duelist now, what with Exodia _and_ a Blue-Eyes in his deck. As for the tournament, it seems Pegasus is content with the partial Puzzle. Wanna know what happened to the missing piece?" Drake asked with a grin. The door of the shop opened, and the Kaiba Brothers walked in.

"I'm telling you Seto, the guy at the antique store offered me 20 bucks for this!" Mokuba said, holding up a familiar piece of gold.

"Mokuba, I'll offer you 20 bucks to stop talking." Kaiba groaned. "Two packs of all your boosters." Yugi got the cards from under the counter and tossed them up. Kaiba swiped his credit card and paid.

"Seto!" Kaiba turned and grinned as Téa ran into the shop wearing a blue skirt and a black tube-top. "I've been looking for you." Téa teased. "Guess what, I got a tattoo. It's your name." Kaiba smirked.

"Really? Show me." He said.

"Not in public." Téa replied with a wink. Kaiba laughed and grabbed the back of her neck to pull her up for a kiss.

"What the hell, get off of her Kaiba!" Yugi snapped.

"Yugi, Yugi, shut up." Drake sighed. "They can't hear or see you. Haven't you ever watched TV, sitcoms pull this act all the time." Alternate Yugi cleared his throat, and Téa and Kaiba parted.

"Oh, Yugi. Sorry, didn't see you." Téa chuckled.

"A lot of people don't." Yugi muttered. "See ya around Kaiba." Kaiba didn't return the gesture, walking out of the store with Téa and Mokuba in tow.

"That is the one good thing about this. You never dueled Kaiba, so he doesn't hate you. He gives you the same indifference he does most people." Drake said. Alternate Yugi whistled as he leafed through a magazine, looking up as a man brought a brown box inside.

"New shipment of the next boosters." Joey grunted, setting the box down. "Sign here." He tossed the clipboard to Alternate Yugi.

"Wait, what's Joey doing?" Yugi asked.

"He's a delivery man for Industrial Illusions now." Drake explained. "He does this in the day and works at the McDonalds down the street at night. In case you forgot, Serenity still needs that surgery, and without you to take him to Duelist Kingdom, he has to get it the hard way." Yugi watched as Alternate Yugi handed the clipboard back to Joey, who left.

"Wow…it's like I impacted everyone else's life." Yugi whispered. "And to think I was gonna throw all that a-." Yugi stopped and made a raspberry at Drake. Drake rolled his eyes.

"Very pleasant. And Téa left a great catch like you." He growled. "Fine, let's go ahead, say…two months." Drake led Yugi out the store door into the school cafeteria again.

"Okay, here we see you…as a member of the chess club." Drake and Yugi watched Alternate Yugi, wearing a brown vest and a blue dress shirt, checkmate the senior student he was playing. "Wimp. At least you're well dressed." He said. A teacher stomped past the table Alternate Yugi was at and shook the shoulder of a girl straddling a boy at the next table, making out with him. Yugi shook his head at the girl's near-Goth clothing. There was no way…

"Ms. Gardner, you're late for class again." The teacher snapped. Téa broke her kiss with Kaiba and sighed.

"Gotta go baby, teacher's squakin'." She said, grabbing her book bag.

"It's okay. Your place?" Kaiba replied.

"Yours, my mom is home tonight." Téa shook her head and gave him one more kiss. "See ya."

"Later Hot Legs." Kaiba waved, winking. Téa waved back as she followed the teacher to class. The near-by janitor tapped Kaiba on the shoulder.

"Speakin' o' legs, ya mind?" The janitor muttered. Kaiba lifted his feet as the janitor washed under his chair. Yugi's jaw dropped at the janitor's blonde hair and brown eyes.

"Joey's the janitor?" Yugi asked. "What about McDonalds and the Delivery guy?"

"Lost the first job when he fell asleep using the deep fryer." Drake said. "Turns out 3 days without sleep makes you a little slow. On the up-side, he's now the head of creative design for cards at I-squared. Pegasus liked the idea of burger-themed Duel Monster cards." Joey went on to wash the rest of the cafeteria as Mokuba walked in and sat opposite Kaiba.

"I just got off the phone with Pegasus." Mokuba said. "It's a go."

"Then he's selling?" Kaiba asked eagerly. Mokuba nodded.

"Industrial Illusions is now a division of KaibaCorp!" He confirmed, slapping Kaiba a high-five. "I just had to agree to sell him my gold-eye thingy, and he caved." Mokuba passed the Millennium Puzzle piece to Kaiba.

"Mokuba sold it to Pegasus?" Yugi muttered in disbelief.

"Yup, the poor guy only ever wanted his wife back. After Duelist Kingdom, he had two Items, and thus with the Puzzle now he has three, enough to bring back his wife with access to the KaibaCorp virtual software." Drake nodded. "So, ya ready to head back to reality yet?" Yugi shrugged.

"I dunno, this place isn't so bad." He replied. "Téa seems happy, Kaiba too for once, Mokuba's in business, and Pegasus gets his wife back. This is actually pretty good." Drake shook his head.

"It gets worse." He said. "It's time to head for the future." Drake pushed open the cafeteria doors. "Shall we?" He asked with a grin. Yugi nodded and walked through, Drake following him.

- - - - - - - - - -

"It's now two months after high school graduation." Drake said, leading Yugi through the room. It was crowded with all sorts of people in suits, and Yugi saw himself on the dance floor, looking around.

"Hey, I finally hit that growth spurt Grandpa teased me about!" He laughed, noticing his alternate self was nearly two feet taller. Drake winced.

"Actually, it's a chair." He said. Yugi's shoulders slumped as the other Yugi climbed down and reverted to normal height.

"Where are we?" He asked.

"Your Grandpa's wedding." Drake said simply. Yugi smiled.

"He got remarried, alright." He said. "To who?"

"See for yourself." Drake replied, pointing through the crowd. The people parted as Solomon Muto walked into the room with the bride on his arm. Yugi made a face.

"Mai?" He gagged, staring at the blonde kissing his grandfather.

"Yeah, they met at Duelist Kingdom, married out of mutual interests. Mai likes money, he has it, he likes sex, she…well, she's good at it apparently." Drake explained. Solomon walked down the room and threw his arm around Alternate Yugi's shoulders.

"There's my grandson." Solomon laughed. "Say high to your new grandmother."

"Grandpa, she's not a grandmother." Alternate Yugi moaned.

"The kid's got a point, none of this grandmother stuff in public. I'm still young." Mai sniffed.

"Congrats Mr. Muto." Kaiba said, emerging from the crowd to shake his hand. "I'm sorry Mokuba couldn't be here, business."

"Business?" Yugi asked.

"Mokuba runs Industrial Illusions now." Drake said. "Pretty good CEO too, but that's mostly due to the vice-president."

"Vice-president?" Yugi asked, not sure he wanted to know.

"But I made it!" Joey laughed, shaking Solomon's hand. He wore a spotless business suit of blue polyester. "Congrats Mr. Muto on da wedding. Can I kiss the bride?" He asked with a grin.

"No tongue." Mai warned. Joey shrugged and tipped her back to kiss her. Solomon shrugged and turned back to Kaiba.

"So how your little lady?" He asked. Kaiba sighed.

"Well between the wedding to plan and the hormones, she's not exactly the most pleasant flower in the garden." He replied. "She's really pissed at me, she thinks its my fault she had to drop out of high school."

"Téa dropped out of high school?" Yugi gasped.

"Yeah, once Kaiba got her pregnant she was kicked out." Drake said.

"Hey, Hot Legs, come over here!" Kaiba called. Téa, only having the slightest bit of a paunch this early, walked over and greeted everyone.

"Listen, I wanna talk business with da champ and Kaiba." Joey said. "Girls, we gotta amscray." The three men walked away, leaving Mai, Téa and Alternate Yugi alone.

"You two enjoy the party, I'm hitting the snackbar." Mai said, leaving. Téa shrugged and looked down at Alternate Yugi.

"Wanna dance?" She asked.

"With me?" Alternate Yugi asked, shocked. Téa nodded, and Yugi held out his hand. The band played a slow song as the two eased into the music.

"So how's the store doing, I heard your grandfather put you in charge." Téa started.

"It's okay. It's a good business, I know a lot about it. Everyone comes by because Solomon Muto's grandson runs it. Being the so-called heir to the King of Games does that." Yugi replied. Téa smiled.

"Yeah, have you ever through about entering the dueling circuit? You might be pretty good." She suggested.

"I don't know. It's crossed my mind, but dueling doesn't seem like my kind of game." Yugi sighed. "How about you, you still trying out for dancing?"

"Not really. It's hard to pirouette with a kid growing in your belly." Téa chuckled. "But I'm not worried, Kaiba said he can support me and maybe even teach me the business so I can join in KaibaCorp someday."

"That's great." Yugi said. The two were silent for a moment. "Its nice being able to talk to you Téa, I haven't seen you in years."

"I know, you're a good friend now Yugi, and always were. I just moved on, and so did you. We moved on to other people." Téa explained. The song ended, and the two slowly parted. "See ya around Yugi." Téa whispered, vanishing into the crowd. Yugi nodded sadly and walked to the buffet, grabbing a paper cup of coffee. Drake gave Yugi a look.

"Huh, huh?" He prodded. "C'mon, start the tears man."

"It's not that bad, really." Yugi sighed. "I'm friends with Kaiba…sort of. Joey's a businessman, Téa's well taken care of, Grandpa…I don't want to discuss it. This is a nice place, even without my friends." Alternate Yugi spun around.

"You had friends?" He asked. Yugi gave Drake a look.

"I though you said they couldn't hear me." He protested.

"I'm loose with the rules, so kill me." Drake muttered.

"You had friends?" Alternate Yugi repeated.

"Yeah, Joey, Tristan and Téa. But trust me, things are better in your world." Yugi explained.

"Like hell!" Alternate Yugi laughed. "I'm 18 years old and I live in my grandfather's card shop! My grandpa married someone young enough to be my sister. The closest thing I've ever had to a kiss was Téa frenching Kaiba and me bumping into them!"

"Boo hoo for you!" Yugi snapped. "You don't have to risk your life and fight evil all the time. Trust me, I've gone through a lot worse things than you!" He marched away, leaving Drake with Alternate Yugi.

"So you can…change the past?" Alternate Yugi asked. Drake nodded. "Is there any other world besides his?"

"Only one, but trust me, it's not much better than what he got." Drake sighed, following Yugi through the crowd.

- - - - - - - - - -

"Thanks, Mr….whatever." Yugi said, sitting back on his bed in the Kaiba Craft. "But I have to get up tomorrow and stop the psycho again, so can I go back to sleep now?" Drake shrugged.

"Okay, you win. Things were better the other way." He admitted. "I'll make you a deal. I'll reverse it all, undo everything, take way all the bad and the good."

"Awesome!" Yugi exclaimed. "Go ahead." Drake smirked and put a hand on Yugi's forehead. "Hold on." He whispered. Yugi closed his eyes.

_"Magician of Black Chaos, attack!"_

_"Okay, I totally just inspired myself, let's have some fun!"_

_"Next I'll use Graverobber to swipe a monster from your Graveyard."_

_"I create a monster without peer, without equal!"_

_"Next turn you'll feel my Harpie's claws, and I promise you, you won't like it."_

_"Yugi, always believe in the Heart of the…"_

"Stop." Yugi whispered. "I've changed my mind…I want to keep it. Put it back." He opened his eyes and looked around his room. Drake was already gone.


End file.
